Today I saw a crazy woman on the street throw a cigarette in the face of a complete stranger. I turned sharply, ready for the fight, but the victim shook her head and said, "Are you out of your mind?" I was amazed at her restraint, but still, you have to admit, it's hard to stay positive in this crazy crack-head town.
For the past two days, I have been trying to make it a whole day without saying something negative. Both days I have completely forgotten half-way through. Here's the thing. People like to say negative things. We love to vent and gossip and bond over our pains, but it has been shown that this actually does not make us feel better. That is why I was trying to be positive for a whole day, even when my initial instinct is to complain. This is hard to do, because as I'm realizing, I'm a pretty cranky person. Oh, how I love the sarcastic, the dry, the woe-is-me.
A man I dated briefly once called me "nice." That's why it was brief. Nice? What's nice? Nice is not funny or smart or talented. This man clearly had no understanding of who I was. Nice is boring. Nice is what you call people who you hope to never see again. "Oh, what did you think of her?" "She was nice. So dull I wanted to stab myself in the knee with my fork, but nice!" These days there's not much to say about being "nice." Except that there is.
Being in theater, I am surrounded by people who are funny and entertaining. They are people who you meet and are instantly like, "I want them to be my best friend!" It's our job. We know how to make an impression. Still, think of the most important times in your life, the big moments, the moments that stick. You may find that you can recall funny quotes, but other things come to mind that never leave. I once had a friend tell me, "You are so genuine. I hope you never lose that." It was out of the blue. It wasn't funny, but it was so kind. It was nine years ago. I remember gossiping with another girl in college, venting about something mean someone said about me and oh-no-she-didn't and all that. The girl looked at me and said, "Yeah, but you're way too smart to get caught up in all that, right?" Just like that, my negative comments were flicked off like a light switch. "Well, yeah, no, I mean...I don't care" was all I could say. What she said wasn't entertaining, but it was honest, smart, and kind. That was also all of nine years ago.
I guess this blog is more about kindness then being positive, but maybe they go hand-in-hand. One of my adult truths is that "It is better to be kind, then to be right". As a lil' Miss Know-it-All, I LOVE to be right, especially in school. But isn't it sometimes better to let someone talk and be themselves and have their self-confidence? Why do I need to correct them? I may not have changed my cranky attitude yet, but maybe I can see when I'm being, well, just plain mean.
Clean it up :)
Let it go :)
Move more :/
Eat right :/
Act energetic :(
"You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late."~Ralph Waldo Emerson
photo by http://www.maine.gov/dps/fmo/MainesReducedIgnitionPropensityCigaretteLawNEW.htm
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